Tuesday, February 22, 2011

Breast Feeding

Photo Credit Vogue

Breast feeding. I hate talking about breast feeding on the Internet. Mostly because most people freak out about it. I'm never a fan of people who think their way is the only way even if I agree with their stance on the topic. For some reason BF'n is a subject that creates Internet hysteria and frankly, I want no part of it. So keep your crazy away from here thanks! I don't judge those who don't breast feed. Its none of my business. With that said, let me get to the point.

We are reaching a time where it seems like Hendrix is moving towards weening himself. He's definitely not there yet, however we are certainly headed down that path. At this point he BF's at nap times and bed time and throughout the night but rarely does he ask for it during the day. If he is teething or sick than he will still want it for comfort but for the most part he is beginning to move on. It is still very much en grained in his sleeping routine but we are working towards putting an end to that.

I'm not sure how I feel about all this weening business.It will be nice to have my body back. That's is not to say that the thought of my son and I no longer having a nursing in our lives isn't heart breaking. because it is. I'll miss it. A lot. but i refuse to let my emotions play into any decisions we make. It's abut him, not me. I would like to practice self weening but I have a limit of 2 years. I really do not want to have to go beyond that. We are going to start moving towards weening at the 18 month mark. I figure that gives us a good 6 months to end it completely.

Breast feeding has changed my life. It has been a deep rooted part of my mothering. My relationship with my son has been strengthened because of it. I'm terrified to leave this era. I can never get it back. Moving forward is hard and scary and so so so very sad. I'm trying to keep my heart from interfering with my head.

It blows my mind that at some point he will not nurse.  

BFers...what is our limit? How did you end? Any advice?


  1. i miss breastfeeding wyatt. i really do. i found that i had to do the final push to end it. this may not be what you're wanting to do, but it seriously only took about a week and he forgot about breast feeding as an option. if you stop the nursing at night, i can pretty much guarantee you that your nursing days will be over than 6 months. that's how wyatt was. he only wanted it at night to help him sleep, and once i stopped that, he learned how to soothe himself and didn't want to be breast fed at all after that. whatever you do, good luck! you're a great mom and you're so gentle with your son! in the end, it'll all work out. :)

  2. thanks! Sometimes i fear im too gentle. Like, im going to make a him a big pansy. lol. i was never the sensitive type till he came along and now i fear maybe im too sensitive. I think once we commit and do it itll prob be a lot faster than im anticipating and honestly, that scares me.

  3. My kids self weaned at 16 months. They were just too busy, and nursing wasn't part of our sleep routine. When they started showing signs of being distracted, I stopped offering. When they would ask I would say, later, and get them interested in a toy. I regret this. I wish I would have keep nursing longer. They were never sick last winter while nursing, even being around many sick children many days a week, but this winter they were sick quite a bit. I wished I was still nursing to help their little bodies fight the germs better. I also miss the bond and the quiet time together. I would recommend waiting until you are both really, really ready. Almost when you just can't imagine having to nurse one.more.time. I think that will be when you know you are ready :) And I learned the hard way that you will still lactate for a while. I was still lactating a full 6 months after they weaned! Good luck!!

  4. My son was fully weaned by about 19-20 months. I had the 2 year mark as my ending point as well. Like many, he was mostly nursed before or after his nap and a night to go to sleep or fall back asleep after rousing mid night.
    It was hard to let go and at the same time easy. I was feeling like I was holding him back from learning to sooth himself back to sleep by always being there with the boob. I was also just tired of getting up at night. I didn't mind the mid day nursing, but again, he wasnt really asking for it anymore. A day came where he didn't ask for it and fell asleep, then a second day passed and I had daddy just rub his back if he woke up. By the fourth day when he finally did request, I said "later" and he didn't fight it and that was the end of our nursing.

    I miss feeling like I'm providing him with what he needs, especially in the winter time, but he's been doing great. Turned 2 this December and I noticed that if he does get sick, he is able to bounce back so much faster than me or my husband, and I attribute it all to the boob juice he had from the minute he was born.

    I'm sorry I don't have much in terms of advice. I hope it works out for the both of you. And if you miss breastfeeding that much, just have another one! LOL My #2 is due the summer. :]

  5. It's odd that since i didn't "bf" but mostly pumped due to funky nips and such, I grew an attatchment to my breast pump and when it was time to stop pumping, i was sad to stop because giving my son that special milk made my heart so happy.

    I'm pregnant with my 2nd now and have decided come hell or high water, this baby IS GOING to latch and nurse instead of me having to hawl that wretched pump around and be a prisoner to it every 2 hours! I'd rather be a prisoner to my baby nursing than that damn pump!

    You both will make the right decision when the time is right. It's SO hard not to let your heart into your head. It's a very emotional thing. I think it's ok to be sad to stop it. Look at me, i was sad over a silly breast pump!!! ;) hang in there girl!

  6. I believe my son and I were both ready when he weaned at about 17 months. He was biting and getting distracted, and he no longer seemed to need the breast to help him get to sleep. I definitely had mixed emotions about stopping and I miss that bonding time, but I wouldn't change it. It happened quickly and it felt like the right time.

  7. my son self weaned at 8 months and i was completely devastated. when i started bf'ing i never envisioned what the end would look like or how it would make me feel. especially if i wasn't the one to initiate. but my goal had always been to bf up until his first birthday at least.

  8. I started weaning Milo at 13months and he was completely done at 14months. My breastfeeding goal was always to get to 12months and I was so proud of myself for getting there. Once you pass 12 months, you can feel a bit like a lone breastfeeding wolf in the wilderness! I'm sorry to say that I had quite a few comments (even from my own mother!) along the lines of "when do you think you might finish breastfeeding? Will you stop doing that soon?" which I took to mean, you should stop now you big freak.
    Around 13months I just felt suddenly totally over it. I wanted my body back badly. So I slowly cut Milo down to 3 feeds a day, then 2 then finally 1. And from there, he just eventually stopped wanting to feed at all. I was a bit sad about stopping breastfeeding - I was lucky and found breastfeeding incredibly easy right from the start and loved my special quiet time with my baby. Right after I finished breastfeeding Milo, I found out I was pregnant again so that helped me feel less sad about it, I know I'll be starting all over again soon!

    This is a super long comment - I'm sorry. I'd just say, wait until you're truly ready however long it takes. I think a lot of babies start to wean by themselves around the 18 month mark. Good luck xo

  9. I didn't BF my oldest (regret - but what can you do now?). My youngest, was BF for 6 months. At that point, it was just too difficult for me physically and emotionally to pump/work 50 hour weeks and continue. So, I weaned. Since he was already taking bottles of breast milk during the day, it was very easy. (Sad - breaks my heart even now!)

    I do have a friend who breastfed her daughter until she was nearly 40 months old. Through out her second pregnancy to boot. Regardless of what anyone may think about that length of time, I was and always will be impressed by her stamina!

    Good luck weening!

  10. My bare minimum will be 2 years. Tre is 15 months and still nursing all night long. I think I'll go to two and a half, weening in spring or summer. I would like my bed back to my husband and myself but not with the sacrifice of him quiting nursing. He refuses any other type of milk so has no nutritional substitute.
    I have no advice except to try to let it happen naturally.

  11. I'll never stop. NOPE. NEVER. Hendo will come home from college, and I'll be like, you want to chase that Vodka with a little bit of THIS?

    JK. I thought Hen was weaning himself a month ago... Turns out he was just sick. He's 17 months now, and I'm only bf when he asks for it. I guess 2 years is my cut off (right now) in my head. But, I hate the thought of not having that time. Yesterday was the first time he didn't bf for a nap. He just cuddled up while we read and nestled down. I'm okay with that, too.

    Most women I've talked to have encouraged the process of self-weaning. I really do think the process will happen naturally. Until then, I'm still loving it!!!!