I don't have a little girl. I have some idea the fears a parent has for a girl growing into a woman in our society. The definition of self respect has seemingly shifted and changed. All of a sudden it is not only cool but feministic to behave promiscuously or to drink heavily.A lot of young girls think its empowering to be, well, "one of the boys". Lady like is out the window and our teens are being told it's cool to act like a horny, drunk frat boy. Like I said, I don't have a girl, I have a boy. So from my perspective I fear about my son's view on woman. How he will treat them? How do I instill it in him to say no when a drunk girl comes on to him? That its better to wait till her mind is in a better state. How do I instill in him to turn a girl around on the dance floor so he can look in her eyes instead of letting her grind her tush all up on him? What kind of girl is he going to bring home to me? The woman I look up to and aspire to be like are vastly different that what's being pushed by the media.
It's a scary world for the parents of daughters. Its scary for mothers of sons as well, trying to raise a boy into a man who will NOT perpetuate the demise of self respect and dignity. This is not to say I don't expect my kid to party. He will. I am sure of it. and party on Wayne. Hell, I sure had my fair share of crazy nights and morning hangovers but how do I get him to not cross that line? I was no saint and is it hypocritical for me to encourage better behavior than I myself had? Its funny how parenthood turned me into a bit of square. I feel kind of old saying this but I don't get kids these days! What are they thinking?
Let's take this video for example from a girl group called The Millionaires. They are working the whole "I'm skanky and I don't care thing" pretty hard. Now a few years ago? I would have been all *shrugs shoulders* whatever makes you happy. In fact, at age 18 I probably would have been into this band. I was never one to judge. But now that I'm a mom I almost can't help but feel bad for their parents. I know, I know, that sounds very judgmental, and really it's not that I think they are bad people but if those were my daughters my heart would break. The whole video is them singing about their drunken escapades, heck, the song is even kinda catchy. Aesthetically, the girls are super cute and I love a good old fashion rebellious teen. BUT somehow they crossed this line into porn references and blatant drug use. No one wants to see their kids in those situations. What is this telling the 13 year old girl watching this? or the 13 year old boy? That woman just wanna f**k and drink?
P.S. NOT safe for work.
It seems that young girls went from empowering themselves and displaying a "I don't give a f**k" attitude to out rightly singing about disrespecting themselves. While I encourage a girl to take charge of her sex life and to be in control of it I certainly don't think that in order to do so you have to sing about your "bomb ass pussy" (their words not mine) and the multiple dudes that are up in it. Even more main stream artists like Katy Perry (who I actually kind of like) and Kesha (who I definitely do NOT like) are mainly singing about being blackout drunk. Paris Hilton has made a career out of being a party girl. WHAT HAPPENED TO CHARITY WORK PEOPLE? Where are the Audrey Hepburns of this generation?
Dear Henry, Please dont bring this home to mommy:
or this...whatever this may be...
Dear gaaawwwdd, NO.
I hope that my son sees woman as people, not objects. I want him to fall in love with someone who has the capacity to really love him back. Someone with intelligent thoughts, and the courage to speak them. I hope she can hold her own, pave her own way, make up her own rules. I hope she will take care of her body, take care of her soul. I hope she will have pride and self confidence. I hope she will be humble and generous. I certainly hope that she is NOTHING like most of the girls in the media today.
How do I counteract what is constantly surrounding him in the news, magazines, and all over the internet?