Tuesday, June 15, 2010

Rose Colored Glasses.

This whole motherhood thing is hard. It's not easy. I think there are about 100 times a day where I am ready to tear my hair out. Where I feel like I am failing or screwing up. Where my kid is covered in sweet potato and he has a beard of drool. And me? Well, I'm currently wearing sweatpants...backwards because I put them on in the dark, and I haven't plucked my eyebrows in days and I'm well overdue for a haircut. I think maybe my blog doesn't always a hundred percent articulate what my daily life is like. 'Cause most days its a mess. A giant mess. Even so, I try to focus on the positive.


I try to look up.
Glass half full.
All the way full.
Bubbling over even.


I've struggled in the past with staying positive. I never called myself a negative person but a realist maybe? But dang people! Sometimes all that harsh reality is too much. I needed some day dreams and fairy tales. The thing I noticed about being positive? It spreads. Its contagious. The universe catches on.

All it takes is one moment. One little minute in my day where Hendrix and I connect. When he looks at me and I can see his baby blues just buggin out with love for me. Where his little hands roam my face, gently, he threads those teeny fingers in my hair and smiles at the softness. Throws his head back with giggles while I kiss his rosebud lips over and over.

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Man, that laugh of his, it just slays me.

Today while he was sitting in his duck (of course) he stopped banging and moving and go go going and looked straight into my eyes and out poured this howling laughter, because looking at me just makes him that happy. We sat there, music softly playing in the background, just starring at each other. Dewy Morning light and so much promise in that little face. and he giggled and giggled. stroking my bangs, smacking his lips.
I mean really, how LUCKY am I?

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I could have sat there in the rapture of his giggles all day but these moments are fleeting and gone it was in a flash and back to trying to eat my nose off my face and banging my head with a wooden block he went.

But those moments, I carry them with me all day. through traffic, and dirty dishes, bad news phone calls and bad dreams. Those moments are my life blood now.


I write a lot about how much love I get from parenting. Probably too much. But I've had enough hard times, Enough bullshit heart ache and I'm done dwelling and focusing on the negative. I started this blog on a sad note and now? Now, I wanna rejoice in the happy. Roll around in the warm, sandy fulfillment I get from this whole parenting adventure. I'm a kid in a pile of warm laundry, jumping into cool leaves in the fall. A pig in shit? Call it what you will but I'm psyched on life.

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So many people waste huge amounts of time complaining and whining their way through life. Ignoring all those everyday miracles. The ones hidden between carpools and bill paying. Between casseroles and yoga class. Between the internet and MTV. I refuse to be that woman. I want to savor all the good. No more sweating the small stuff for me.

Life is too short. Too fast. and way to fleeting.


  1. So true. Thank you for sharing this I can definitely relate.

  2. "Live in the now , have fun" =)

  3. Just adsore those beautiful blue eyes - and you can't see anything else! If I told you that you would miss this time of your life, you probably wouldn't believe me - but those days when you put your clothes on backwards and wear drooly sweet potatoe on your shirt - they truly are magical times - every great magical story is full of all kinds of emotions - and that's just part of the magical times!

  4. Swinging by from SITS. GREAT post. Really it's fabulous. I feel like you must have written it just for ME. It's exactly what I needed to hear today!

  5. I couldn't have said it all better... You have pegged how I, also, feel on a regular basis. Great post!

  6. wow! your baby's eyes are to die for!!! thanks for visiting my blog!

  7. you are a lucky lady. H is the smooshiest. glad you know that!

  8. omg how adorable!! I don't know how you mom's do it!

  9. God I just heart this kid. SO FREAKING CUTE. I am glad that you see things this way. More people should feel like this. You, friend, are awesome.

  10. has anyone ever told you that you look like natasha leggero?


  11. What a beautiful post! And your little guy is beautiful too ;-)
    Thanks for commenting on my embroidery tutorial. Comparing my napkins to Pottery Barn stuff just made my day!

  12. A) I want to eat him up
    B) I know exactly how you feel about those sweet laughing moments
    C) I want to eat him up.

  13. Beautiful post - this is just what I needed to hear today! Your son is adorable!

  14. Cute post and adorable little one :)

  15. First of all I just have to say you are beautiful! I just saw the picture of you and your husband heading out and just had to say that. Second, what a great name for your adorable baby, I love it! Thanks so much for your comment on my blog today. It meant a lot.
    Stopping by from SIITS.

  16. aww what a lovely post! hendix's eyes-- oh my! totally and completely get lost in worthy! and you describe the ying-and-yang-ness of mama-hood so very well! those ups and downs can get you, well down, i suppose but you did *such* a great job of bringing it all back to the glass half full-ness of it all! thanks for the smiles!

    btw, i found you through mommybloggers and am so glad that i did! :)