Saturday, November 27, 2010

Ranting about Retard

I am getting pretty sick of hearing people throw round the word "Retard" like its nothing. I'm a little confused here. Isn't this word when used in any non medical tone just as degrading as, oh I dunno, The "N" word. How about the 'F" word? It is considered socially unacceptable to throw around these angry,hateful words but Retard? Eh, that's nothing. I don't get it. Teach me.

marky 030

Better yet explain to this "retard" why you are using the medical term for his condition as a hate word.
Go ahead. Tell him why you feel it is okay to take a word that describes him, back it with your bitterness and anger, and throw it around casually.

Personally, I feel discrimination doesn't come from the actual word but the tone in which it is being used. So, let us go ahead and say someone cuts you off in traffic and you decide to deem them a "retard". Hmmm, well you are implying he is an incompetent, Ahole who cant do anything right. Using the word retard has now turned you into a bully. A socially irresponsible one at that. Way to go. I'd rather be a retarded all day long than be a bully.

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Why don't you say it to his face? Yes, him. My brother. He is in fact mentally retarded. He is also insanely compassionate, empathetic and most importantly not devoid of human emotion so when you use the "R" word it hits him where it hurts. He is sensitive to the fact that he "different from the other kid" He knows. He doesn't need that shoved in his face or pointed out. Using the word "retarded" is meant to imply that that's a bad thing. and for him? and all of us that love him? It's not a bad thing. It's a challenge and an obstacle but everyday he wakes ready to attack it with ferocity. By using that word you cut him down and chip away at his self esteem.

Ask an adult with Down Syndrome if they have ever been called retarded. Ask them how it felt. The same way it feels when a chubby girl gets call "fat" or when a young gay man is called a "fagot". It stings. Bad. No one wants to be labeled. No one wants to be boxed in by the color of their skin, their weight, their religion, and certainly not by their IQ level. 

Bottom line, TREAT OTHERS THE WAY YOU WANT TO BE TREATED. We have no right to refer to anyone who is in a different station than we are by anything other than their name.


  1. I absolutely LOVE This post! I also have a brother who is mentally retarded... he has autism. But nonetheless, he is one of the brightest people, most compassionate, honest and more interesting than most of us out there...

    Good Job on this post!

  2. I also want to say your brother is the CUTEST kid ever!

  3. I hate the word too and it annoys me when my stepsister, a teacher, uses it. Also? Your brother is so cute. I could just eat him. But I won't. Because that's cannibalism.

  4. I just came across your blog a little while ago, and thank you so much for writing this post! I hate it when people use the words retarded and gay in these ways. It bothers me to no end.

  5. Being the parent of a child with special needs, I also find this word very offensive. My step daughters who are 8 & 12 used the word without even knowing the true meaning and I think that a lot of adults use it without even thinking. When I told my step daughters that people may use that word in a negative way about their brother, they were offended by it. Sometimes people just need a gentle reminder. Maybe tell them to go to the Spread the Word to End the Word website and take a pledge.

  6. Very well said. I hate also hate when people use that word. Some people honestly just dont care and its so wrong because your brother did ask to be "special" (I hate saying mentally retarded, I just feel so bad for saying it, so I refer to them as special because they truly are). I agree your brother is adorable. I had/have so much respect for you even tho I dont personally know you but Anthony has told me so much about you and your brother and it made me respect you so much more.

    Everyone deserves to be treated equally no matter how different they are. And I 100% agree with the statement Treat others how you want to be treated. And I def agree that everyone should spread the word to end the word and take the pledge. I just did and hope many others will.

  7. I just read this for the first time, it's great, emotional and 100% right. I hate hate hate hate when people use that word as if it's nothing, good for you to write this, and i love your brother and we still have one of his cell phones whoops!! -C