Ranting about Retard

I am getting pretty sick of hearing people throw round the word "Retard" like its nothing. I'm a little confused here. Isn't this word when used in any non medical tone just as degrading as, oh I dunno, The "N" word. How about the 'F" word? It is considered socially unacceptable to throw around these angry,hateful words but Retard? Eh, that's nothing. I don't get it. Teach me.



Better yet explain to this "retard" why you are using the medical term for his condition as a hate word.
Go ahead. Tell him why you feel it is okay to take a word that describes him, back it with your bitterness and anger, and throw it around casually.

Personally, I feel discrimination doesn't come from the actual word but the tone in which it is being used. So, let us go ahead and say someone cuts you off in traffic and you decide to deem them a "retard". Hmmm, well you are implying he is an incompetent, Ahole who cant do anything right. Using the word retard has now turned you into a bully. A socially irresponsible one at that. Way to go. I'd rather be a retarded all day long than be a bully.


Why don't you say it to his face? Yes, him. My brother. He is in fact mentally retarded. He is also insanely compassionate, empathetic and most importantly not devoid of human emotion so when you use the "R" word it hits him where it hurts. He is sensitive to the fact that he "different from the other kid" He knows. He doesn't need that shoved in his face or pointed out. Using the word "retarded" is meant to imply that that's a bad thing. and for him? and all of us that love him? It's not a bad thing. It's a challenge and an obstacle but everyday he wakes ready to attack it with ferocity. By using that word you cut him down and chip away at his self esteem.

Ask an adult with Down Syndrome if they have ever been called retarded. Ask them how it felt. The same way it feels when a chubby girl gets call "fat" or when a young gay man is called a "fagot". It stings. Bad. No one wants to be labeled. No one wants to be boxed in by the color of their skin, their weight, their religion, and certainly not by their IQ level. 

Bottom line, TREAT OTHERS THE WAY YOU WANT TO BE TREATED. We have no right to refer to anyone who is in a different station than we are by anything other than their name.

Home is Where the Heart Is

We looked at a loft yesterday and fell in love. I'm dying over. Trying sooo hard not to get my hopes up but everyone cross everything you can possibly cross for me!! I'm not even going to go into detail about its awesomeness. It has everything we could want. The only downside is it's not in our favorite location but I figured there would be some compromise.

I'm feeling ready but no lie, I'm scared. So many WHAT IF's when you rent and at this point buying doesn't seem like a good option.
I prefer stability and security and I think this experience was a lesson that noting is ever set in stone. This whole year was really.


But the biggest lesson this year?

That it really does not matter where we live or what our place looks like. Home is where the heart is. 
So many nights over the last few months spent with my family huddled in a cozy bed for cuddles and love and I can assure you it felt just the same at the in laws as it did in our fancy loft or our old farmhouse. Still just as sweet and right. I know that no matter what the future holds, no matter how many bumps or bruises or financial hits we may endure, I've got the best of the best in my boys.

So...
NOW it's time for the fun part. Decorating! Howsa 'bout some home decor inspiration...
This is what I'm going for...






























Sources
Home Sweet Style
 Elle Decor
Apartment Therapy
We Heart It

You Are What you Eat.

When it comes to parenting I try to stay as neutral as possible. Parenting is such a unique experience for all of us that while I certainly have my personal likes/dislikes, I try with all my might to keep from judging others. Breastfeeding, cloth diapering, co-sleeping...they are all such heated debates and while I know whats right for my family, I can't say I know what's right for others.

But.

I can not for the life of me help judging others when it comes to nutrition and diets and what not. It's the one thing I get all judgey wudgy about. I try to mind my own but the obesity epidemic that is rolling its way across our nation is sickening. No one seems to want to take the blame or own up.  i can't help but point the finger at the parents. When you oversee every little detail of your child's life how do you possible slack on the most important...their HEALTH!

A good example...

We grabbed a coffee the other day a little after lunch and there was a mom and her daughter (oh, say, maybe 8 years old?). Both were overweight. The mom got a ginormous chocolaty coffee thing and she got her little girl a large...LARGE!!... blue coolatta and a doughnut.
Okay, I'm no rocket scientist but I am pretty sure this is the reason we have such an obesity problem.
Not only is that an insanely unhealthy snack but the portion sizes push the calorie limit to the absolute brink. My guess is it probably had as many calories as some people's meals.
Even if you pay devil's advocate and say 'oh, maybe it was a special treat" why not get her a kiddie size, or even a small? Why a LARGE???

Parents need to step up and take some responsibility for what their kids eat. Society certainly plays a part and with the constant push for fast food and designer TV dinners but at the end of the day we are the ones who shape and form our children's eating habits.

I stand by that the old saying "You are what you eat" and if this is so then I'm currently a bowl of cheerios and a plate of fresh fruit. My son? He ate the same this morning.
My goal is that he eats what I eat and I eat healthy so he should develop the same healthy relationship I have with food.
Ya know,
SETTING
A
GOOD
EXAMPLE.

Okay, I am done with the rant. Now I wanna know...
A. How do you teach your kids to enjoy healthy food?
B. Whats the one thing you let them splurge on?
and
C. Whats the one big parenting issue you just can't help but judge others on?

Why I am a Sucky Mom...Part 2.

This weekend I learned one of the most valuable lessons us Mamas can learn. Unfortunately the source of this lesson learned was not a book or a fellow wise parent but my bathroom floor.

Yea, my bathroom floor.

The lesson? I need to take care of myself.

I'm certainly no good to my babe if I cant even take care of myself.

and how did I come to this epiphany?

I passed out cold.

Did a face plant on my bathroom floor.

The diagnosis?

Dehydration and micturition syncope.

I passed out while going tinkle because it caused my blood pressure to drop and BOOM I woke up terrified and insanely nauseous. I couldn't even form words at first I just laid there making noises before I could finally call for help.

Michael called 911 and I was rushed to the hospital.

Honestly, I feel pretty stupid. I'm really good about eating. I eat a lot.I'm pretty good about drinking too. I only drink water, coffee and milk and sometimes ice tea. But I was slacking on my water intake and I had only had coffee that morning and then went back to sleep for a nap which was a bad combo.



For someone who prides herself on eating so healthy and taking good care of herself I feel so silly and embarrassed.

So I'll be taking it slow on the blog for a few days. I'll be taking it slow in general for the rest of the week.

Baby Brain

Hi...I used to be cute.

I'm not sure when it happened but I have become THAT mom. The one without anything to talk about except her kid. The one who is all baby and nothing but.
I'm sending out my SOS, people.
This weekend I did all of the following:

1. Had a babysitter and yet nowhere to go.
2. Made a reference to my fav pair of heels and called them "impractical"
3. Discussed an amazing chair that ive been eyeing for years and actually declared in public that if I did buy it it would be for the babes nursery and I would have to pass it down to other babes cause I would feel guilty spending that much on myself
4. Stopped myself from putting on perfume because I was nervous it would make the babe sneeze.
5. Went to put on my trademark liquid liner only to realize its missing and I haven't applied it since before the munchkin was born anyways. So I'm using the word 'trademark" loosely.

I no longer recognize myself. Operation De-MOMITIZE Adriana (well only de-momitize a bit) is in full effect!

Suggestions? Advice?

I'm losing myself here and I need to wade myself outta this mama mud I'm stuck in.

Obviously step 1 is to get out a bit without my kiddo but he is insanely clingy lately and I miss him when I'm gone so easier said than done.

Step 2 is to get my beauty and fashion shiz together. I have no excuses for not putting a lil time and effort into myself (hello unibrow...wax much?) . It's just that personal hygiene has become such a pain in the ass lately. Big ups to the Hubby for lying through his teeth and telling me I look stunning everyday.

Am I the only one out there that has gotten so lazy?

The Great Spank Debate

Angry Baby

Alrighty ladies and gents, I wanna know...

Do you spank?

Time magazine just came out with an article on a recent study that has shown that children who are spanked totally show more signs of aggression, a need for instant gratification for their needs and wants, and a more defiant temperaments, among other things. Grab the latest Time and check it out...it's very interesting. It is the first study that included different controls involving the mother including her age, drug use, and if she contemplated abortion or not. The overall findings were that spanking creates a more hostile child.

I am hardcore against spanking and always have been. It's just not my thing and honestly the thought of harming Smoosh in any way is so heartbreaking, even if it when he is being fresh.
Call me crazy but if your kid hits you and you whack 'em back...errr how are they learning not to hit? I mean I think its common sense. But that's just me.

I was a nanny for young children for years and I think through that I have developed the patience of a saint as well as learned many a technique for discipline.

I know a LOT of people are totally comfortable spanking or do it out of desperation when they just can't take anymore.

So lemme hear it people... this is a judge free forum...do you spank? Why or why not???