Wednesday, February 8, 2012

Is it me or has the blogging atmosphere changed tremendously in the last few months? I love that people are finding success through their blogs but I miss the days before sponsors and scheduled posts. What happened to just blogging what was currently inspiring you? All these posed photo shoots and contests and delicious recipes that I cant cook and crafting projects I could never come up with, it's too much for me. Everything is so perfect. Perfect instagrams and pinterests and vimeo accounts. I can't keep up.
I'm having a hard time dealing with all these internet pressures.
Truth be told MY LIFE ISNT PRETTY ENOUGH FOR PINTEREST.
and i'm okay with that.
I took Hendrix to the craft store today to buy supplies for homemade Valentines.  I wandered the aisles, grabbing doilies and googley eyes. About 20 minutes in I realized I had a cart full of pink crap but I wasn't having fun. I was majorly stressed out. I had no plan. I should have googled or downloaded an app or picked up one of those holiday themed magazines you see at the grocery checkout for crafting ideas. For a minute, I panicked. I felt inferior and incompetent and most of all, I really didn't want to let Hendrix down. He deserves pretty craft projects. He deserves a picture perfect life with home cooked meals and organized playrooms and color coded bookcases and a tidy laundry room with lots of natural light. I was spinning. There I was, Wednesday morning in Joanne Fabrics with tears in my eyes and pipe cleaners in my hands.
Then
I looked down at Hendrix with his big eyes and sugar sweet smile and chubby knuckles and thought
Fuck it.
I took him of of the cart, grabbed some plain cards, and let him run free in the sticker aisle. He picked out five sets. Fish and puppies and ice cream stickers. None of them having anything to do with Valentines day. All of them having something to do with what brings him joy.
He kept saying "Thank you so, so much Mommy, Hendrix so, so happy"
Then we came home and he colored like a mad man and stuck hamsters on top of ice cream trucks and made fishies kiss boston terriers and I thought
Pin THIS.
Life is the little things. The things you cant stick on a virtual pin board. The things that would make Martha Stewart shudder.
I am not that mother. I will always be in awe of those who can and who do and who bake and who organize and who pull it all together. But that's not me.
In this house, in my arms, my boy is loved.
It's messy, and imperfect, and it's ours.
Our unorganized, mismatched, overflowing, never on time, always in love life.

I did good today. Those valentines? They are the most beautiful I have ever seen.

68 comments:

  1. LOVE OVE LOVE this post Adriana! PIN THIS! I actually just just signed up for a pinterst but not because I want to show off my awesome taste to all my digital friends or connect with anyone - it works really well for a designer because if i happen to see a logo or something I like I can save it easily and return to it when starting a new project in need of inspiration! So for that its cool but I agree people need to disconnect a bit more. Also CUUUUTE PHOTO!!!

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  2. im totally with you. thats why i signed up fr it to. lately my feed is flooded with lists of things to cook or projects to make instead of just beautiful and inspiring pictures.

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  3. This is an awesome post. It's nice to hear others say the things I myself am already thinking. I don't think the blogosphere has necessarily changed ... maybe just the blogs you used to and usually enjoy ... have maybe changed. I don't have sponsors. I definitely don't do the Top Baby Blogs contest. I blog and write and craft and photograph and make because I seriously, thoroughly, enjoy it. I enjoy it. I love doing it. It gives me great huge amounts of joy and satisfaction. I rarely get comments and a ton of the time I wonder if anyone even sees/hears/reads what I am posting about. I think it's about all finding our niche and where we fit into. I see you and I think you are absolutely drop-dead gorgeous. That I could never compare. That you have killer style and a really cool life. And that's okay. It's okay to admire others and what they have ... but to also know what it is that you have. And sometimes I do get lost ... but then I gotta remember what it is that makes me tick. Me. Staying true to me. I don't even know if this makes sense. But I love you and your posts and your input and your vision. Don't let what others do make you feel inferior ... because just like them, you have your own fanclub ;)

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  4. I've recently done some unfollowing- I can tell (and everyone else prob. can too) when blogs change to their scheduled posts and what not. I don't mind a sponsored post here or there if it's something I can REALLY tell they believe in - but the blogs that all of a sudden are just all about sponsors and give aways every other day--I'm over it. It's now why I started reading certain blogs in the first place. OVER IT

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  5. I absolutely loooove this post. I'm right there with you. it's exhausting trying to make things perfect. that pressure to be perfect is everywhere. home, hair, makeup, outfits...I've just had to face the fact that I will never be the girl with styled hair, perfect makeup, a fashionable outfit, and perfectly painted nails - as much as i'd like to be that person, I'm not. and, with age I'm finally starting to feel okay with that. thank you for this post. it's just what I needed.

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  6. I adore this post. My life is not pinterest worthy and my blog just happens when it happens. You are my favorite kind of person. And Hendrix's too, obviously. So freaking sweet. What a wonderful mama you are.

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  7. this is a great post! so honest and true and i know exactly where you are coming from. there are times when i post i think "is this crafty enough, are my photos are ok, blah blah...." and then i think...wait. why do i blog? oh ya, for me. i started my blog as a personal journey and sometimes i need to remind myself of that because i get caught up in everything else. so, thanks for reminding me ;)

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  8. i've stopped reading so many of the blogs that i used to love because they don't have any personal stories anymore. they're all starting to look like magazines with ridiculous, unnecessary (but pretty to look at) D.I.Ys and outfit posts. You aren't the only one who ends up feeling like you're doing something wrong.

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  9. THANK YOU! I love those websites for seeing pretty things, but seeing a great blog/blogger be honest was really really refreshing.

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  10. A fantastic post that says, I think, what a lot of us are thinking. I've really only just started blogging regularly, but I've been reading for a few years now. Whilst I love some of the diy ideas that get posted, I do sometimes wonder; who are they for? I can't see some of these things being appreciated by husbands or children. Lots of these things are created for other women only. Like most of the things we women seem to do, we are only doing for the benefit of other women. Hell, my valentines gift to my husband is a big glass jar of red lollies. It took me about 5 minutes to put together and cost virtually nothing. I know he'll love it, (and make himself sick on it) and appreciate it more than any other love heart inspired crafty project i could make.

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  11. I love LOVE this. Thank you for sharing it. I'm a blogger who does do ads, and has done a handful of sponsored posts- and I'm making my living writing, slowly. BUT. My stories and my voice are absolutely authentic and still that is 90% of what my blog is. I'm proud of that. I stand by it. I've stopped visiting two 'bigger' blogs that I can think of because the personal stories are almost dried up. It's BORING. I don't want Martha Stewart beaming out at me from every place, either. xo

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  12. throughout this whole post i just sat here reading saying "word" to myself and shaking my head up and down. i completely agree that i am oh so very happy for those people too but i've been around the block long enough to notice that things have changed.
    i have taken a HUGE step back from the internet lately (yes to instagram, goodbye to twitter) and really like how it feels! that picture of the two of you made my heart melt. and i can not wait to see those valentine's day cards h made!! <3

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  13. I LOVE THIS POST. probably my favorite post i've ever read. i agree with you 100%. while i enjoy filtering through pinterest and getting ideas for meals, after awhile you just start to feel a little down on yourself. i can't tell you how many times i've thought, "how does anyone have the time and money for this stuff?! i don't even have the time to sit down and finish a bagel alone without two little girls whining at my feet for a bite."

    i was JUST talking about this the other day because i've noticed the same thing lately with so many of the blogs i used to read a lot. outfit posts, contests, reviews, guest bloggers, blah blah blah. i'm not into it. that's precisely why i've never "promoted" my blog. i don't need 5,000 plus followers to make me feel like i'm doing something right. i post what i post when i want to post it and mostly i do it for far away family, but if there is someone out there who also enjoys it then i love that too and am happy they read it :)

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  14. THANK YOU! <3 i have stopped blogging...my divorce isnt pretty and I feel no one wants to hear about me trudging to two jobs,or the fact that everything isnt always glossy and fun like it once was.The irony in your update is that I think your life is very lovely indeed! Your family is adorable and I think you are one of my most favorite and hip, yet down to earth blogging mommies Ive met. I think the lesson we all should remember is we are moms and we need to help support eachother, not make things appear as they aren't or make anyone feel left out. KEEP DOING YOU!! Sir Henrix thinks youre the bomb.com so you're doing no wrong!
    xoxo
    adrienne K.

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  15. YES!!!! Love this post, you are an amazing momma!!!!

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  16. I adore this post. My thoughts exactly!!

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  17. I bet they are the best valentines day cards ever :-)
    and your a great mama :-)
    I prefer the day to day life blogs, the scheduled posts sometimes stress me out or get to wordy that I don't read them

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  18. aww you are a sweet mom. our valentines last year sound kind of like Hendrix's this year, and they were my fave so far. I should get cracking on this years. also, I appreciate real deal blogging--i was a huge lj user, and I like connecting with people's real lives. It's nice to look at visually pleasing things, but I like real life more. I think that's why I like instagram a lot--a nice snapshot into people's lives

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  19. LOVE THIS POST. My life isn't pretty enough for Pinterest, either :) WHO ACTUALLY HAS THAT MUCH PERFECT NATURAL LIGHTING FOR PHOTOS, I MEAN COME ON!!!

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  20. Yes, yes, YES. I feel like I've taken a step back from blogging due to precisely what you posted. I'm a little jaded over it all. The atmosphere has changed- have sponsors, have thousands of followers, have the perfect outfit that is perfectly photographed, etc. And honestly, the content, the words, are rarely inspiring. It's just "here, look at all this perfect!" I can't help but think people just don't care about the soul anymore. It's all aesthetics these days and it bums me out.

    At least I can find what I've always been looking for in blogs here. Thank you for that.

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  21. OMG. this is so much exactly precisely how i FEEL ALL THE TIME. i have a wedding coming up in 3.5weeks (AAAAAAAAAAAAHHHH), and feel so inadequate when I see all the perfect and amazing and c/o-ed weddings. and i'm a mom too, so forget about how awful i feel about being a full-time working mom with not as much money to buy her the best clothes ever. I am hoping to become a blogger, and honestly, what has stopped me is the horror I feel when i think about how much mine would suck in comparison to so-and-so.
    maybe i'll start mine tomorrow ;)

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  22. "PIN THIS!!!" OH HOW I LOVE THAT!!! JUST REMEMBER THAT BEING A MOMMY IS A HARD JOB IN ITSELF!! SOME MOMMY ARE CRAFTY AND SOME ARE NOT AND ITS OKAY!!! EVIDENTLY YOU FOLLOWED YOUR HEART AND SAIF "FUCK IT!" THAT MOMENT YOU KNEW WHAT WAS PERFECT FOR YOU AND HENDRIX....THAT WAS TO LET HIM LOOSE IN THE STICKER ISLE!!! THE END RESULT...A CRAFTY LITTLE PROJECT AND A HAPPY HENDRIX!!

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  23. I will be pinning this for future reference when I need to step away from all of the perfection online. I love the way you write, the words in this post are exactly what I feel but couldn't express in words myself. I've taken a step back from my own blog because I realized I was getting caught up in trying to be more perfect in others' eyes. It's not worth the time after my son is asleep to edit all those photos and write shallow posts.
    Thanks for being real :) I needed to read this, it's encouraging.

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  24. I love everything about this post. I feel like so much blogging has shifted to being Pinterest friendly. Photos and posts are now deliberately screaming, "PIN ME, PIN ME!" which drives me crazy. I love that many of the blogs I read provide practical and fun DIY projects but a lot of it is missing the personality and voice that it once had. Right on.

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  25. Amazinggggg post!! Seriously I've been feeling this way for a while which will probably explain why I've been in such a funk lately. I don't craft much (although I like to I just don't have the money to spend on crafting supplies), I don't have a ton of followers to plan posts out, I'm not even organized enough to schedule weekly posts. Yeah that's never gonna happen. I'm one of those people that just say whatever I'll do what I want and what makes ME happy because I will never be able to keep up with some of the bloggers I've come across. I don't have the budget to buy outfits that I won't wear or blog about repeatedly and I don't have the budget to constantly find new and amazing places to eat. I guess in the end all you can really do is what makes you feel comfortable.

    Love, Jazmyn

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  26. so glad to have found this post. thank you for being real and vulnerable and writing this. it is so incredibly helpful to me to know i'm not alone in my disillusion.

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  27. I agree, even being a new blogger. Though I've been trying to blog for over a year now I just can't seem to stay inspired when I feel that you have to have a $100 layout, photoshop, and a Nikon to have a reader-worthy blog. Being a college student I just can't afford that nor do I have the time! Though I find this post extremely encouraging as well as a relief! I'm glad someone finally said something!

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  28. I love you for this. I recently decided something similar to this, in the way I dress my kids and whether or not I do DIY's. haha
    (I have a whole blog post planned) But I decided to focus on what comes natural to me and that is a very basic set of things.

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  29. Here Here!!!! you've made my day, I have just read your post after a very unsucessful attempt at making Cake Pops that appeared on another 'perfectly organised' blog. Soooo happy right now that i'm not alone.

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  30. Ha ha...I'm not a mommy but still very imperfect. I suppose my blog will never have sponsors, c/o clothing given for me to model, or have really awe inspiring tutorials but I do post crappy pictures of me posing creatively to inspire others to dress for fun. :) So....I get it....and agree with it. I love your tone...pin this :) So funny! You should never let the perfect images in social media get to you. Just like on TV and magazines...there are flaws...just not everyone shows them. The flaws are what makes us unique. The fact that I take crappy photo's, well its kinda become my MO :). Keep being real...keep being a funny mommy...you got this! Hearts, Janna Lynn

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  31. I love this post. Don't get me wrong, I do crafty mom shit because I like it, but I also have a pile of laundry, messy kids, and most days I don't get out of my pajamas until it's preschool pick up time. I will never be a fashionista and I am ok with that. I'm lucky if I wear makeup twice a month. Everyone has their own thing, finding it and embracing it is key.

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  32. THIS made me tear up. This is what should be on Pinterest, to be honest. I'd rather see more people like myself than those with picture-perfect lives. Thank you for sharing this.

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  33. Yep, you sure did good! I hear you lady. I often get asked why I don't have hardly any outfit posts on my blog, especially when I am selling vintage clothes? Truth be told, with a 16 month old son, full time study and a house to keep - I hardly have time to take a shower, let alone make myself look decent for a photo. The recipes I do get to post are a celebration of the fact that made something quick, easy and healthy for my family, that didnt turn out a mess and us all having to have chicken nuggets again coz Mama can't cook very well! Thanks for reminding us how it really is - you have yourself a new follower ;)
    Toni x

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  34. I have sponsors and Pinterest and a Vimeo account - and I LOVE this post. Several blogs I used to love reading have morphed into shiny, plastic-coated, perfectly posed versions of their past lives with very little to share that feels heartfelt or real. I like pretty DIY posts and even fancy recipe posts with food l'll never cook, but when a life is portrayed as being so glossy and perfect that it no longer feels genuine, it loses its appeal. If I want to look at a magazine with airbrushed models and fancy clothes, I pick up a Vogue - not a blog.

    You rock. So glad I stumbled in your blog.

    xo,
    melissa

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  35. You are the best. I always LOVE reading your thoughts. Breathe, lady. xo

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  36. thank you for sharing what so many bloggers think but are too afraid to admit. it gets so overwhelming trying to be crafty, stylish, and perfectly put together all the time. Keep doing what you are doing because it is working. You seem adorable and very real. That is all that matters..

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  37. I definitely think that Pinterest and to a lesser extent instagram a while back has really upped the ante on photography on blogs. It is great to be inspired by these images but it does so quickly turn into a comparison game, even if you are the only one comparing yourself to these people.

    For me, I blog to keep in touch with friends I no longer live near. I write for them and that keeps me on track and prevents me from jumping on the latest trend bandwagon. The people who know me reading such drivel would let me know fairly quickly. Perhaps keeping a focus on who you're blogging for will help keep it in perspective. If in doubt, write for yourself in 5 years time: will you be happy to look back on this?

    Thanks for the really great post!

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  38. Amen!

    Fuck it, for sure.

    This inspired me so much.

    We are practically perfect in every way. (Thanks, Mary Poppins!)

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  39. Just found your blog via sometimessweet.com. I just want to say I love this post. Perfection is overrated and living in genuine moments are where it's at. Never mind having to take a perfectly exposed photo of it or live Tweeting as it unfolds. Just do what you can and enjoy it!

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  40. Wow! Girl! You just nailed it! Exactly how I've been feeling these past few months! I've unsubscribed/unfollowed/ totally ignored social media for I've felt this is not what I am LIVING for! I want to savor the
    Moments. Instead of inspiring me its given me disillusion . Thanks for letting us know that others feel this too! Here's to Real Life! Enjoy!

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  41. :) I found this through a pin :) I, too, have gotten exhausted by the crazy all the time. And while I love to be crafty, it needs to be organic and not forced into me. So those little bursts of creativity pop up and back down.

    I threw out my crazy plans to make 30 UBER class Valentine's last night, and designed a card online and picked up my prints at Target this morning. PERFECT, simple and $5. :)

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  42. visiting from sometimes sweet. i just had to let you know that my oldest son's middle name is hendrix. :)


    oh, and the people who read my blog have to really, really like me, because my life will never be pinterest-worthy either.

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  43. Thank you, thank you, thank you. You've pretty much said what I've been thinking. Live your life and enjoy it. I need to remember that these days. :) Thank you for sharing.

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  44. I blog regularly, and do 2 post a week where I highlight a Pinterest Project something I find on Pinterest and recreate. I love your post today and it made me smile b/c 9 out of 10 times, the attempt that I make looks and turns out nothing like this amazing craft on Pinterest. So, I still post it anyway! lol

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  45. "Pin this". Gah I love that line.

    I agree with your assessment. I don't do sponsors, I don't do giveaways and I don't do contests for that very reason. Not that it makes my blog or me better than those who do; I just don't enjoy the blogs that do that all the time. They don't feel authentic.

    Confession: I do post recipes to my blog, but they are FAR from perfect. :)

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  46. wow i loved everything about this post.
    i actually recently stopped blogging because I felt like I couldn't keep up with blog world. It always made me feel inadequate so I just deleted my blog and continue to live my life undocumented without those unnecessary pressures.
    I still tweet, instagram and pinterest but those things make me happy.. for some reason blogging didn't.
    I love how you said that Hendrix looked up at you and was still so happy regardless of everything being perfect... you'll always be perfect to him even if your life isn't as pretty as others. But you know what? Those others we see.. it's a show! Their lives are just as messy as ours! Being yourself is the most important thing.

    -Jessica

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  47. I always love your posts and honesty. I don't believe that anyone or anything is perfect, life is full of imperfections and craziness and that should be part of what makes life interesting. At least I tell myself that when I have my toddler hanging off my leg screaming while I'm trying to throw dinner together. The internets are a funny place but I think as long as you are true to yourself that is all that matters. Nothing is all unicorns and puppy dogs no matter how people try to sell ya on it!

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  48. That was great to read, Im glad I found this post! sometimes it looks like people are living just to create a blog.

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  49. Hands clapping....I feel the same way so often! Good for you for writing it.

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  50. Such a great post. It's so easy to get caught up in all of the "perfect" hoopla when sometimes, the simplest thing is not only all that's necessary, but the best.

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  51. thank you so much for this!
    as a younger woman, I often feel like the blogosphere is filled with perfect mothers with their perfect children, and I feel so intimidated by their perfectly scheduled posts and amazing home projects, and a life that seems so unattainable for me! Thank-you for being honest about the realities of motherhood! It sounds like your boy had an amazing day!!

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  52. what a beautiful and hilarious post. Thank you!!

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  53. You said this so well! And everyone's so damn pretty too! My daughter is one and I still rock jeans and sweatpants most times. I see all these beautiful women nursing and looking like they just stepped out of a JCrew catalog and it makes me want to crawl into a dark cave.

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  54. thank you so much for this awesome post!! I feel the same way....this blogging world can be very overwhelming!:)so happy to have found you ! looking forward to more great posts!

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  55. A million cheers for you! Damn straight! I couldn't agree more that "my life isn't pretty enough for Pinterest."

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  56. I teared up when I read "Thank you so so much, Mommy. Hendrix so, so happy."

    That's how you know you're doing it right.

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  57. This is wonderful. I just came across this one post, but I plan on following you from now on. I can so appreciate this, even as a mother-to-be. There is a lot of pressure to have this amazing look nursery that could be posted on apartmenttherapy, and a lot of imminent stress about whether or not I'll be able to support a creative and happy child. Thank you so much for this!

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  58. Love the post, I wrote one w/ a similar theme(though lengthier, lol, I'm not quite as succinct as you) a couple weeks ago. http://thekippers.blogspot.com/2012/02/fitting-in-perception-vs-reality-and.html

    I especially hate all the sponsored crap. My blog is just about my family. Period. It's for my girls to look back on and read. Do I love making new blog friends, sure if they are normal and not creepos, but for the most part, my blog is my diary. The same thing I used to write in when I was 12... just the grown up version. And I certainly didnt have sponsored posts in that diary. LOL

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  59. I haven’t read a blog post this real in a very long time! I completely agree with the business blogs taking over. All the sponsors and giveaways make the whole thing so impersonal. It’s been difficult finding blogs with real content and emotion. I think you are an outstanding momma! I can imagine your wide-eyed, beautiful boy happy as can be, all because you chose to live simply. I love it!

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  60. I agree with Sarbear, I want to hug this post and you. I get it. I feel it too. You inspired me to put it in words as well. Thank you for getting it.

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  61. HI ADRIANA! i am sending you the sunshine award.

    http://christinerojas.blogspot.com/2012/02/i-am-thrilled-liz-from-peach-on-earth.html

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  62. Adriana, I really appreciate this post. This is something I struggle with-- with great editing, we all can make ourselves appear romantic (pinterest worthy). I haven't read your blog or any for that matter in quite some time.... I have neglected my own writing... I guess I took a break--sometimes I have a hard time seeing all of this edited perfection. It is hard to swallow when my reality is well, real. The first time I ever learned of pinterest was here on your blog... you posting breathtaking images you mined from the deep layers of the internets. I remember feeling my shoulders drop once I clicked into that feed and into all of your boards... I couldn't believe all of the beautiful images you collected.. then I thought--Oh my god. I am a photographer and what am I doing? I have nothing on all of this. This exists? That is possible? Who are these image makers? I can never amount to this. Really, it was just another moment of inadequacy. But, you bet I got a pinterest account... but-have I pinned much? No. Do I feel guilty about it? As usual. Eh, anyway, is it obvious that "I feel ya, girl" ?
    Well, from the outside looking in, you are beautiful--to be envied, even.
    xoxo Paula

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